Day 30: Ignore Today

Our instructions for today just said "ignore today." I guess that could be taken as an off day, but I decided to take it literally, like have an "I dont care" day.
This morning I got up and didnt shower. And I wore jeans and a plain white tshirt and a pullover sweater and sneakers. I know, that sounds like the outfit of every highschooler in the universe. but that is definitely not an outfit I wear very often. especially when I havent bathed. To top it all off, I didnt put on any makeup. NONE. and, I didnt do anything with my hair. I just put it in a gross ponytail. I went downstairs, ate breakfast, didnt talk to anyone. Then I realized I had a full half an hour of extra time since I didnt get ready at all, so I went back to sleep in my clothes. In my car I played Sigur Ros, because it seemed to fit the "Ignorning everyone, being introverted" kind of thing. My sister asked if I was okay, i just nodded my head, and we listened to it in silence. I got to school and my friend Xena pulled up right beside me as I was getting my bookbag and she gave me a weird look and said "are you okay?" and i nodded. we got into school and she touched my arm and said, "really, are you alright?" I brought a book in so when I sat with my friends I read instead of talking. When I sat down Mia said, "Brittany, are you okay??" and I just nodded again. I went to government, took a quiz, and went to sleep. In newspaper I had to talk, but I only did to ask questions, and I didnt chat. In Spanish I took a quiz and did homework and only talked to Arthur a tiny bit. I went to lunch and did calculus homework. After lunch I had calculus, and I never talk in there anyways because I hate that class, but I sat and thought about things, and how I felt, and I started to get really sad feeling. Like, I realized how much of an effort it was for me to be so antisocial and sad. That kind of made me happy, because I realized that I'm a naturally happy person, but I really hated it. So I wrote betty a note that I will eventually send to make me get my mind off of things, and after that I had art with mia and I was done isolating myself, so I pretty much quit then. But I still looked really crappy.
I didnt like today. Not just because I hate feeling dirty and ugly, but because I hated feeling lonely, even if it was just fake. It was the worst feeling, even when I was surrounded by my friends and I was the one acting weird. I hated it so much.